Abstract

Psychoanalytic theory and practice have moved toward privileging relational and attachment dynamics as both cause and cure of many of the issues that bring individuals into psychoanalysis and psychotherapy, highlighting the significance of each therapeutic relationship as a key part of the work. But, what is that relationship? We are not parent/child, nor are we friends, but a deep, mutual bond often develops and enhances the process. Fantasies of being friends, emanating from either and/or both participants, can represent important, often unformulated, aspects of this relationship. Psychoanalytic theory has not fully explored meanings of this wish to be friends, but it is my experience that finding ways to reflect on a wish or fantasy to be friends can lead to deeper and more complex understanding of adult attachment. In this article, theory and clinical examples will be utilized to examine resistances as well as contradictions, conflicts, and hopes and fears that come into play when thoughts, fantasies, and wishes to be friends to enter the therapeutic space.

摘要

精神分析理论和实践已经倾向于将关系和依恋动力学视为许多问题的原因和治疗方法，这些问题将个人带入精神分析和心理治疗，强调每种治疗关系作为工作关键部分的重要性。但是，那是什么关系？我们不是父母/孩子，也不是朋友，但深厚的相互联系往往会发展并加强这一过程。成为朋友的幻想，来自任何一方和/或双方参与者，可以代表这种关系的重要的，通常是未明确的方面。精神分析理论尚未完全探索这种希望成为朋友的意义，但根据我的经验，找到方法来反思成为朋友的愿望或幻想可以导致对成人依恋的更深入和更复杂的理解。在本文中，